Tuesday, January 17, 2012

The Beginning of Beckett's Story

About 5 years ago my husband and I decided to have a baby.  I also had 3 children from my first marriage. Since this was my second marriage and my husband had no children of his own and I wanted to give him children. However, we had an obstacle that we had to overcome.  I had a tubal ligation when I was 28 after my 3rd child and it was medically irreversible. We decided to take a chance with IVF to have a baby.  After all the initial testing and finding everything was normal we proceeded with the regiment of shots and the stressful emotional ups and downs of going through IVF.  We were very surprised and excited to find that of the 3 embryos we implanted, 2 of them made it.  We were having TWINS!! 
During the pregnancy we had several frightening experiences of losing them.  I prayed the God would protect my babies and keep them healthy bringing them to full term.  I was on bed rest for a total of 19 weeks.  I held on with them until I gave birth via C-Section at 36 weeks and 6 days.  My baby boy was 6 lbs. 13 oz. and my baby girl was 7 lbs. 2 oz.  Both were healthy and came out screaming.  We were so happy about our new additions to the family.  
The first 3 months were no doubt a sleepless fog.  We had help from family and friends that gave us breaks every so often to allow us time to get at least 5-6 uninterrupted hours of sleep. I still have trouble remembering that year and how we ever made it. 
This year was an eye opener and I never expected to have this path of difficulty set in front of me.  Raising young children before I knew what to expect when an infant should be meeting basic milestones during that first year and so on.  The first few months of the babies lives I didn't think much about whether or not they would meet these milestones. This could have been because of the lack of sleep and working full time teaching.  But as the twins began to get older I noticed that Pyper, my baby girl was right on target with sitting up, crawling, and had a keen interest in her toys.  Where as Beckett, my baby boy could not hold his head up well or sit up on his own after 4 months without being propped up by a pillow. I started taking mental notes of some of the odd behavior he began to exhibit. He screamed during every bath time and could not focus on toys or hold them in his hands. His muscles were very rigid and stiff. He would lie on a changing table for a diaper and he was stiff as a board.  These small things that most people might overlook, wrenched my inner most maternal instincts. It felt to me that something was very wrong with him. I knew I was right when the pediatrician became concerned at his 6th month well check visit. I didn't realize that this was the beginning of a journey I never thought I would have to take. I know God has a plan and I am in the beginning of this plan trying to find out where I fit into it and where it will lead me, my son and my family.